男友要求不溝通 – 覆A girl behind the “workaholic”

Dear Zita:

I've read your column at she.com a lot. And,
I respect highly ur (your) feedbacks to people coz (because) I think
you are so honest, and straight forward. Although I'm always the person
to turn to in terms of love advice, you know, to friends. And, I always
believe I'm very rational in taking care of love issue. However, I just
can't think of a way to solve my own dilemma. I hope you can help me.

My bf (boyfriend) and
I have been together for 2 1/2 years. He is 7 years older than me. We
live together in a very nice apartment, and everyone thinks that I have
a perfect life, of course, including myself. We are very competitive,
and I'm sure that he is that kind a guy I want because of his strive
for his career and constant advancements. When I'm with him, things
always go forward.

But recently, we are having
problems. His long work hours has made both of us so stressful. Most
of the time, even we live in the same house, he rarely talked to me.
Plus, we are working on some projects together (not work-related) and
our disagreements on work has even intensify our problems. I've tried
very hard to be understandable, yet I can't stand it anymore, and I'm
going to burn out.

Then, there was a chance for
a talk between us. And, I've bought this issue up to him, and I said
to him- even though I understand our situation, I think I deserved a
little attention, perhaps just a few minutes per day, you know, talking
with him. But he looked at this as- he has to give up his career kind
of thing. You know, I've never asked for that. I know his career is
important, especially we have a series of long-term plans together.
I just want to maintain our relationship, like the way before- very
close. But he told me he needs 100% of attention to his work. And, either
I have to keep the way it is i.e. maintain our low level of communications
i.e. 0% due to his long work hours. Or he has to give me up- this sentence
has made me heart broken.

On one hand, I know that he
loves me much. You know, based on the way he treated me now and before.
We've never missing one thing in our lives, in terms of our life styles.
It's just we don't communicate. I personally would want to keep this
relationship, but I just want to know, whether I've asked for too much,
or he's giving too little? I've tried to be strong coz (because) I don't
want to be victimized. But be honest, my stress level is at a all time
high, and has made me see things very unclear. I would love to hear
your advice.

Thanks for your help.

A girl behind
the "workaholic"


Dear
A girl behind the "workaholic"︰

有時候,男人很自私,也「猛憎」,兼且勞氣。當工作有壓力時,他們要全世界,甚至美國總統與主耶穌也遷就他們。可怕啊!

我有一個絕招,就是扮傻。他不快樂,我依然分秒傻笑,他發我脾氣,我轉頭又笑。他見我如此,知我不被他所擊倒,還不好意思繼續虐待我。

反而會被我感染呢!

他要求「零」溝通,你就由得他好了。你自己一個食薯片看笑片,他要加入就加入吧!

有些男人很差,自己不開心,亦要影響別人不開心。

不要輸給他!

深雪覆

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